I saw this movie today around sunrise when everyone was sleeping.

So I went to log the movie in my Letterboxd account and saw the director of the movie, Curry Baker and it all made sense. That is why Ian looked familiar to me yet I couldn’t recall any of his other films. Reason is that I know him from his YouTube channel, where he and Curry make funny skits. I really went into this one blindely.

The movie is mostly carried out by performances, camera angles, and horror tropes. The plot is super mid, and in hindsight, it does feel like an extended horror/comedy skit that Curry and Cooper would do on YouTube.

From a realism and immersion standpoint, Bear’s decisions and reactions made no sense. Neither that of the other characters. None of them act like any sane person would around an unhinged and weird Nikki. But them acting irrationally is the only thing carrying the plot forward, otherwise Nikki would’ve been in jail or admitted in a mental institution after the first night, and we wouldn’t have had a film at all.

Every character in this movie is a shitty person. Bear, because of his obsession (yes, it’s his obsession the movie is named after), that causes him to make a wish and trap Nikki under a spell. Ian, who apparently is Bear’s closest friend but for some reason doesn’t tell him that he has been casually hooking with his crush. Instead, he gives him advice on how to ask her out. What a dick. And Nikki as well. No one is that aloof that they can’t perceive someone’s feeling towards them by their attention to you and their willingness to spend time with you and the way they talk and move around you.

This movie is very good low-brow entertainment though, and it’s good for movie night with friends. But it could’ve been better. Also, I already sensed the ending halfway through the movie.

I guess it could a be a memorable B-tier horror movie that kids growing up would reference years later. It’s not going to have an impact on the horror genre or give us any pop culture icons.

Rating: 5/10

So last night I saw The Fountain. I was looking for a certain kind of vibe and visual experience and couldn’t find anything that would fit that criteria. But after going back and forth with ChatGPT for two days, I finally settled on this movie. But what an experience man.

So there are two ways to understand the story. One is the way in which the movie itself tries to explain the plot, and the other way which I think is much easier to understand.

So we have three timelines playing simultaneously in the movie (not technically). One timeline is the current timeline in which our scientist Tommy is trying to find a cure for his wife Izzy’s cancer. The second timeline is a future timeline in which another version (Tom) is also trying to save his wife who has turned into a tree and is trying to take her and himself in a biosphere bubble to the dying star called Xibalba. The third timeline is from the past. Now it could be a real timeline, but most of it is told from the perspective of Izzi’s book. That timeline is in New Spain during the 16th-century Spanish conquest of the Maya, and that version (Tomás) is trying to save the queen by finding the tree of life, a tree whose sap gives you immortality. 

The movie itself is an audio-visual experience and has these sad pieces that are very artistic. Every scene looks like it comes out of a painting and there are a lot of visual motifs. The background music is also very sad and hopeful at the same time. It evokes a certain kind of melancholia inside you.

The movie leaves you with a bittersweet kind of ending. I can tell you the ending but it still won’t be a spoiler because it is very hard to understand the movie. Plus I don’t think there’s a single interpretation. Everyone will have their own idea of the story and plot. I don’t even think the movie tries to really tell a story. Rather, it tries to convey a message by this artistic feeling. It’s like if a painting started moving. That’s what this movie is like, and you have to extract your own meaning from it the same way you do with paintings.

The message I got from the movie is that death is an inevitable experience that we all must be willing to enjoy. It is not the end but the start of another book, which can only start one you happily finish the last chapter of the previous one. (the final chapter motif). Once you die, your atoms become part of the universe, which will then be used to create new life. In that way, you never actually die.

Hugh Jackman has one of the best performances in this movie. Instead of all the onscreen angry rage he’s known for, you actually get a crying Jackman, a contemplating Jackman, and just a general sadboi Jackman. And it all looks natural. You actually forget he’s Wolverine and view him as this normal doctor-husband guy.

And there’s Rachel Weisz, who plays the wife, and the queen (and the tree I suppose?). Her wife character comes off as this like aloof, pixie dream girl. Which I’m going to be honest, is my head cannon about her real life personality. She is definitely not like that in the mummy, or the movie Constantine (which her only movies I can remember right now), but it’s just like the way she looks or behaves or the way she sounds that kind of gives me the feeling that she’s like that. Anyway, she plays that sort of personality here, which is endearing to watch.

I was disappointed by the fact that there is no actual star named Xibalba that they mention in the movie (the nebula representing the Mayan underworld). I thought it would be a cool rabbit hole for me to get into, but sadly it was all made my sci-fi for the movie. There is an actual nebula that they Mayans associated with creation, the Orion Nebula, but there is no Xibalba :(

Rating: 9/10

Let me start by saying that I did NOT enjoy this movie. I was suggested to watch this movie by a brand new friend that I caught like a Pokémon about two months ago. So in lieu of keeping the Pokémon placated I decided to give this movie a go. It had Jude Law, Natalie Portman, and Julia Roberts. I like Jude Law. He was great in Sherlock Holmes and Enemy at the Gates (those are his only movies I watched). So I thought with such a high profile cast, this would be the most peak movie ever.

I was disappointed.

Closer is just a bunch of people doing a bunch of people things. But none of it is intriguing or captivating. If I have to summarize the plot, it’s basically just four people talking. Actually, there is no plot to begin with.

And the characters are equally empty. I get the idea that they were supposed to be flawed and not someone to root for, but I couldn’t even feel anger towards them. There was also no growth or even anti-growth (regression?) for that matter. Nothing changed at the end of the movie.

Instead of an actual good movie, it seemed like one of those arthouse movies that are designed to be Oscar bait. And it didn’t even win any. Only pretentious critics can enjoy something like this while talking about “themes” and sniffing their wine glasses.

I read people’s comments saying it’s a dialogue driven movie. The only good line in the entire film was when Larry describes the human heart to Dan.

“Have you ever seen a human heart? It looks like a fist, wrapped in blood!”

And the only visually enjoyable thing was Natalie’s pink hair stripper aesthetic.

Speaking of Natalie, I think a lot of earlier Natalie Portman movies have her in very mediocre roles. Not to say she’s a bad actor, but in her earlier movies she was literally just cast as eye candy whether it was Léon: The Professional or something like Star Wars.

Anyway, I rate this movie 💩💩. Complete waste of time. Not even philosophically deep or anything. If you want to watch trashy people doing trashy things, just go to X (Formerly Twitter).